7 weeks

So here I am at the 7 week mark. It's strange, because when I say it that way, it seems like it's so early that I'm practically not pregnant at all. At the same time, these past 3 weeks feel as if they were really 3 months. Maybe it's just because we've been faced with everything in our lives changing within these few weeks - maybe it's because so much is changing with my body so fast. Eitherway, it's very surreal.

Aside from the fact that I'm ridiculously tired ALL the time, I find myself wanting to be nowhere but home now. I just want to be curled up on my couch and I want to be with TJ constantly. (My book said this could happen.) It's an inexplicable desire. Not that I didn't want to spend time with my husband previously; I've always enjoyed that. But now, I want to be curled up on the couch with him and that's it - all.the.time. I guess the only way I can describe it is that I want to feel as close to him physically as this event in our lives is making me feel emotionally. I want to be able to look in his eyes and smile and laugh with him as we talk about this new little one and what it means for us, and I want to feel safe and comfortable in his arms while my whole world is changing. He's been very obliging to my clingy-ness and I love him for it.

Then there's a whole other part of my psyche that is telling me to get up and go! To jam as much as I possibly can into these precious months before all is changed. To enjoy this time being a "single being" - not directly responsible for the life and well-being of another. Go to the beach while you still have a pre-pregnancy body, enjoy evenings out with friends, make last minute decisions to quietly window-shop at your favorite home-stores - maybe finding a good deal on that perfect addition to the living room! Do! Do! Do! I really can see the logic in all of this. Maybe next tri-mester I'll finally find the energy.

I'll I can say is this is a whirlwind. This kid has no idea how much time and thought has already gone into it's tiny, little life, and we're just getting started.