Little Sprout

all i want for christmas is my little leta-bug

2009-12-18T19:49:00.000-08:00

Unbelievably, Christmas is in exactly a week, and my daughter will be 10 mo's old Christmas Eve. I don't really even understand how it can be, but it really does just keep getting better and better when it comes to Leta. The amount of love that I feel for that little girl makes my breath stop, makes my chest clench up, and makes me feel like I could burst, it's so intense. I guess I'm starting to understand what people mean when they say "you never knew you could love something like this...". Uh, yeah - check.

As a family, we're still faring the same. TJ and I are working a bunch, trying to get some house projects accomplished (we're actually finally starting to wrangle in our yard!), make money out of thin air for christmas presents, birthdays and vacations, and somehow, find time for each other. Despite all of that, I think our relationship is smoother and stronger than it's ever been. I feel like we've come through the growing pains of our relationship changing, with the addition of a very demanding little housemate, and we've hit our rhythm both as a couple and as parents.

As far as Leta goes, she's simply amazing. The biggest "new" of this past month, has been Leta taking her first steps by herself. It seems crazy to even say, as she's still so tiny, but there it is. She had been standing by herself for the past month and about two weeks ago, she took her first step. It's quickly progressed to several steps at once usually ending in a stumble one way or another. Tonight she stood up at the coffee table, turned, let go and confidently walked to the adjacent armchair. No stumbles, no lunges, just walking. She went nuts giggling and bouncing - so proud of herself. I don't know how long this process usually takes, but it seems like she's progressing very quickly. I think we'll have a full-fledged walker in the next couple of weeks. Seeing that she's never really crawled, TJ and I are just in awe of what's happening. Other than that, she's got 6 teeth, her hair is getting longer ever so slowly and she says "hi dada", "mama" and "what's that". She's amazing.

More after Christmas - maybe after New Year's too ;)

and she's off!

2009-11-23T18:05:00.000-08:00

It's just after 9 at night. The baby's been in bed for an hour, the ice cream's already been scooped and eaten, and I should be sitting down to some computer work. However, I thought I'd check in here and honor my promise to try to update on a more regular basis. The week's been a little nutty. I'm working more and more as Leta gets older, which is great, but it also means less time for me and TJ, less time for errands and housework, and pretty much no personal time. Ahhh, the sweet rhythm of my new life... ;)

As far as things go that are wonderful and easy and impossible to truly complain about - it's all about the Leta-bug. Somehow, she's 9 mo old tomorrow. I'm finding it hard to explain where the time has gone and to wrap my mind around the fact that in 3 months, I'll have a one-year-old. In the meantime, Leta's busy being a rambunctious 9 mo old. She's still doing her "army crawl" and trying her hardest to walk. Lately she's been walking circles and circles around the coffee table, adventurously lunging from one piece of furniture to the next and cruising around in her walker. She's got a mouthful of new teeth and her hair's finally long enough for me to put little rubber bands in the top. She laughs easily, eats everything and just seems to genuinely enjoy all the newness and excitement of life. As you can tell, I'm still completely smitten.

I'm really excited for the Holidays this year, with Leta in the picture. Not because I can't wait to buy her gifts and dress her up, etc. More along the lines of I'm kind of excited to see what the Holidays are like as a proper little family. I've done the corny things that now just feel cozy and bring a smile to my face - like order personalized Christmas stockings.... I just can't wait to start little traditions that will become part of what Christmas is to Leta as she grows up.

I'm sure any checking in I'll be able to do will be light with the aforementioned Holidays looming, but I will be back! :)

Why, hello again :)

2009-10-19T21:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, yes, yes, I KNOW. I haven't posted in forEVER. I'm a bad "blogger". I blame it all on work and husbands, and that little red-head in the living room with the two new bottom teeth!

I've thought about posting again, even really wanted to, but just the simple act of trying to figure out where to start felt...overwhelming. Lots of things can easily feel overwhelming these days. Things like cleaning my house, getting some exercise, getting my work done on time. Not terrible on their own; they just quietly add up and add up, then - BAM - overwhelmed! Anyway, I'm not feeling overwhelmed right now, and I miss having a little record of what's going on, so I'm going to make a go at keeping up with this on at least a somewhat regular basis. no promises

So, to bring everyone up to speed, Leta will be 8 mo old at the end of this week - insert gasp here! - and she's really amazing. I KNOW!, what a cornball thing to say, but that's the first thing that comes to mind when I think about my experience with her right now. I say right now, because, in honesty, it's been a journey to get to this point, with some lows that I hadn't anticipated. Those first few months are tough, man! Even with a good baby - - just tough. I think I can understand why #2 might feel like a breeze. I want to say that the hardest part of it all was the early on adjustment to life as 3, as parents, as caretakers of a totally helpless being FOREVER. I think that by #2, you've already got that portion of it all figured out. For me (I want to say for us, but I better stick to just speaking from my perspective alone) it was a very difficult transition time from who we (TJ and I) were then and are now, as well as a massive transition time for myself. Lots of introspective musings on my new role and who I was a woman, etc. Anyway, I think all 3 of us have hit our stride now, and for the most part, are moving along smoothly and happily these days. Let's talk more about the mini!

Leta, leta, leta is just amazing! She's so smiley and fun and just has her own little unique way of doing everything. She isn't crawling yet and seems determined to move right into walking instead. She wants to stand and play, has started walking along the couch and coffee table and is constantly trying to wiggle her hand out of yours when you hold hers while she's walking about. She's got this crazy feather fluff of strawberry blonde hair on top of her head and electric blue eyes and these two silly little teeth on the bottom! She waves at everything that moves - and a lot that doesn't, loves to see her reflection, and babbles to all of her toys. She's an amazing sleeper and a short-term napper, and full of energy and excitement when she's awake. She loves her swing on the front porch, walks in the evening and pretty much every kind of food we've given her. Oh, and her cheeks are made out of marshmallows (maybe her thighs are too). We're so smitten.

There's so much more to say, but I guess that at least gets the ball rolling on this thing. Let's chat again soon, k?

12 weeks

2009-05-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

Thought for the day.....
After several t-shirt changes and a couple of outfit changes for her - all before noon - one begins to questions the mere physics and biology of that much coming out of someone so little ;)

11 Weeks

2009-05-13T21:19:00.000-07:00

It's been forever and ever since my last post, but frankly, time's a scarce commodity these days! My little Leta bug is nearly 3 months old, and I can say with all truthfulness that it just keeps getting better and better.

Leta started sleeping through the night (11pm-8am - give or take a 1/2 hr) this week, and I am slowly regaining my sanity - - although, I still speak all jumbled up half the time. I swear this might be permanent brain damage from the sleep deprivation of the first month.....you think I'm kidding.... I can now speak about that first month without the urge to crawl into a little ball and rock back and forth. It was flippin' hard - and we have a good baby! I don't know how mother's of multiples, parents with colicky babies, or single moms do it. Seriously. All hail those people. It was flippin' HARD. I "know" that we want to have another baby at some point, but when I think of having to live through the 3 weeks of every 2 hour feedings, I just want to die. It is SO SO much easier now that Leta can go through a day with a max of 5 feedings. I remember one specific day, early on and when Leta was going through a growth spurt, when I counted how many times I had breastfed in 24 hours and it was 15. No joke. I wanted to cry - still do when I think about it. Thank god I had a husband that was around for the first month (he took a full month off from work to be home with me and the baby) truly trying to do everything in his power to help out. I know that was a rare gift and it's one that I need to remind myself of everytime he leaves a half-finished project lingering around the house....

I can also say, truthfully, that I dealt with some "baby-blues" the first 2 or 3 weeks. I've never been one to deal with hormones gone wild during periods and whatnot, but my emotions were out of control those first few weeks at home and I fully blame it on the hormone levels that hadn't yet settled down. I'm talking about absolute, uncontrollable crying. U.N.C.O.N.T.R.O.L.L.A.B.L.E. Like, during dinner. For no reason. Unexpectedly. - - - Well, maybe there was the reason that my life was turned upside down, but usually I can manage that type of stuff without sobbing. Out of control hormones freak me out. All is well now, coincidentally - and if I'm caught crying these days, I darn well meant to. :)

I've gotten past the shock of the "foreverness" of the situation and now can't really imagine my life without Leta in it. The best part is that it's starting to feel like my life again. Some days are still totally overwhelming, but for the most part, it's just back to the grind. TJ and I are both working, laundry is getting done, bills are being paid, pictures are being taken and we're getting ready to go on our first big family trip! We'll be heading to S.Illinois for TJ's annual family reunion in just a week from now. Should be interesting, seeing Leta's dislike for car rides (this trip requires a 5 hour ride there and back from Chicago after a 2 1/2 hr plane ride), but we'll survive.

As for Leta's leaps and bounds, she's smiling and "talking" to us all the time. As mentioned, she sleeps through the night in her own room and wakes up being the happiest kid you've ever seen. She squeals, but we're still waiting for a laugh (god I can't wait for that day!). Leta had her first little road trip with mommy and daddy last week (to Ft. Myers) and first hotel stay. It all went great to be honest (except for the part where I was bfeeding her in the car and she pooped out of her diaper on me and the seat and then vomitted all over herself and me in one fell swoop, but that's a whole other story). That coincided with her first swim in a "big" pool, as opposed to the little one we bought for her at home. She holds her head up incredibly well and loves to stand up (with tons of support of course).

My kid's rad.

6 weeks

2009-04-05T19:42:00.000-07:00

Number one - I'm so in love with this little blue-eyed, strawberry-blonde girl, that it's incomprehensible.

I find it hard to update this blog because I feel like so much happening that there is too much to document. Too much to even know where to begin. In so many ways, everyday goes quickly and she eats, sleeps, spits up, poops, cries, smiles, and the day is done before we know it. Within those mundane functions though are all of these amazing moments that I just don't know how to describe. She's lovely and I'm really a lucky woman to be able to witness her learning life each and every day.

In the more particulars of day to day life at the Poole household....
We're approaching 6 weeks! Little mini's a month and 1/2 old and is changing at such an amazing rate everyday, right before our eyes that it's breathtaking. She is becoming more and more alert - really looking at us and the world around her. She LOVES windows, lights, the fans and her plastic links toy (which is the most simplistic, cheap toy, btw). She's also taken to the baby bjorn and the sling but is still really hating the stroller and car rides unless she's so knocked out asleep that she doesn't know what's going on. She holds her head incredibly well and, despite the fact that "What to Expect..." says it's the worst thing ever, is sleeping very happily on her tummy. She's smiling a good amount, coos, and is starting to make these squealing noise. She also snores like a fat, old drunk man. She's sleeping well - usually 4 hours when we first put her down for the night, followed by 3 more and we're into the next morning - so not so bad. Oh, and she LOVES the tub. She just zones out with this funny little smile on her face. It's awesome.

I'm doing well, aside from the mega-bags I have under my eyes (which I'm scared will take years to fade away). I went for a run (jog) for the first time this past week - - trying to tighten up my flab-dominals. I have a doctor's appt on Tues - my final post-partum check-up. Hopefully me and my whoo-whoo can have a rest already - FINALLY. I start back with work this week too, and feel pretty up to the challenge of scheduling out our super hectic lives. It'll work because it has to.

All in all, I'm fully enamored with my new little family. Life is so sweet.

1 month

2009-03-24T12:59:00.000-07:00

So, so say a lot has happened since I've last updated here is a bit of a gross understatement. My last entry was chronicling the final hours leading up to the big trip to the hospital. At this moment, I'm typing with my 1 month old daughter sleeping (snoring) in her sling hanging from my neck. I feel that there were too many experiences to try to recap them all now. I've just been too busy to fill in the blanks over the past few weeks. Too many emotions, too little sleep - - and when I do have the free time, I didn't want to be strapped to the keyboard. Most know my "delivery story", so I really don't feel the need to recap that once again, and I'm eager to start updating on our present-day life. We're learning on our feet and Leta seems to be thriving, so we can't be screwing up too badly. :)

Leta's pretty much amazing. Her little personality is coming out more and more each and every day. Her physical abilities change from day to day as well, which always leaves me wondering what she'll blow me away with next. I'll deal with a few hours of crying just to see one smile creep across her face (which, luckily, we don't have to deal with that often, incidentally). I'm heartbroken that a month has already gone by, because I can only imagine how quickly the rest of them will go as well. Never has my life seemed more meaningful to me. Let's start there. I'll try to start updating again regularly, as I'd like to start chronicling Leta's life with us for my own memory. In the meantime here are the vitals and some pictures of how she's grown over the past month:

Birthdate: Tues., Feb. 24th 5:49pm
Weight: 7 lbs. 11 oz.
Height: 19 inches

Weight when we left the hospital: 7 lbs. 0 oz.

1 Month Weight: 9 lbs. 13 oz.
1 Month Height: 22 inches

39 weeks

2009-02-23T10:26:00.000-08:00

Ok, so much to cover in a small amount of time. As you can see from the pictures above, Leta and I have been doing a lot of walking this past week. The walking didn't through me into labor, but it did make Leta drop significantly, as you can easily see in the pics. This left me with a good amount of discomfort, as her head really settled down in my lower abdomen / pelvis. Fun! I worked over the weekend and felt pretty good the whole time.

So we're all set to go to the hospital today and then this morning, I had some bleeding, which has never happened before. It's carried on very lightly through this morning, so I guess I might be in early labor? I'm leaving for the hospital in an hour and 1/2, so I guess we'll get it all figured out!

Very exciting!!!!

little nothin'...

2009-02-18T21:29:00.001-08:00

This is one of those surveys that floats around on myspace and facebook, but it was aimed at married couples and amused me, so I thought I'd go with it...

What are your middle names?
Mine is Danielle and his is James. Although, if you were to ask him what TJ stands for, he'd probably tell you Thomas Jefferson, just because he's amused by how many people actually believe him. It's these silly little things about him that strangely make me love him.

How long have you been together?
Married 2 years on Monday and together 6 1/2 years.

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
I met him at the surf shop I was working at in December of '01, but we didn't go out for the first time till November of '02. Just a solid year of intense flirting.

Who asked whom out?
He asked me. I absolutely refused to be the one to make the first move, much to the dismay of several people. I felt pretty strongly that if he was interested in me enough it was the least he could do :)

How old are each of you?
For these short few months he's 29 and I'm 28. I revel in these few months ;)

Whose siblings do you see the most?
We're both one of two siblings and his brother unfortunately passed away a few years ago. My sister lives nearby, so we see her on a regular basis.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Ugh. Probably finances? I put a question mark because we don't really fight about them in the traditional sense. It's just a tough, uncomfortable time in life with lots of bills and never "enough" income. We stress about it together (me more than him).

Did you go to the same school?
No mam. I went to Liberty University in VA and graduated in '01. He got his aa at Santa Fe' CC in Gainesville and then went to Florida State Fire College. I think he finished all that up in '00.

Are you from the same home town?
Close. Although we're both from out of state, I essentially grew up in Boca Raton and he in Coconut Creek. I'm originally from CA and he's from IL.

Who is smarter?
We're smart in completely different ways. I tend to be more on the book-smart side while he's got me beat in the street smarts category. Frankly, though, I don't think I could do what he does for a living - for many reasons - but one definitely being the intelligence level it takes for all of the medical knowledge. It'll be interesting to see the mix Leta gets.

Who is the most sensitive?
Wow. Without even a hint of hesitation, me. That's all that needs to be said there.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
It's hard to say, as we don't have one favorite place. I'd probably say, when it comes down to it, it's Thai Sushi Express in Deerfield. Awesome, awesome sushi, hands down, every time.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
France. Amazing.

Who has the craziest exes?
I think I probaby win this one, although, he's has some winners in his past too. I think I'm the only one with a certifiable psychopath though. Lucky me.

Who has the worst temper?
Neither of us has a really hot temper, and the things that get under our skin are completely different. I'm probably more easily annoyed and I tend to stay irritated longer. He gets more upset, when he gets upset, but gets over it sooner.

Who does the cooking?
Mainly me. I enjoy it more than he does. He's kind of relegated to the grill. I also make him make all egg dishes as I always burn them. He makes a great shrimp primavera and he has a couple of other gems in his sleeve, as much as he might try to act like he doesn't.

Who is the neat-freak?
His empty cups and clothes EVERYWHERE drive me INSANE.

Who is more stubborn?
Oooo! I win, I win! (He comes in a close 2nd though)

Who hogs the bed?
TJ does what I like to call a tornado with the sheets in which he wraps them all around his legs and then proceeds to sleep in the middle of the bed. It's not appreciated.

Who wakes up earlier?
TJ for sure. Usually just because he has too, but I love me some sleeping in.

Where was your first date?
We went out for sushi, then to a dive bar with some of his friends. It was great.

Who is more jealous?
I guess me, although I wouldn't consider myself to be a jealous-type person in general.

How long did it take to get serious?
We were more or less serious from the beginning. We had a first date and then a full-blown relationship that started the next day and never ended. There was never talk of seeing other people or not spending most of our time together. I was sure that we were meant to be from the beginning honestly.

Who eats more?
TJ. But I enjoy eating much much more. TJ could live on bologna sandwiches alone. g.r.o.s.s.

Who does the laundry?
I do mine. He does his. Equal rights and responsibilities in this household.

Who's better with the computer?
Neither of us is good with the computer. We're functional. End of story.

Who drives when you are together?
Usually TJ, but not because he's better. I have spent the past 7 years of my life driving all around Florida for my job and I'm more than happy to pass the reigns over to someone else when I can.

39 weeks

2009-02-18T21:03:00.000-08:00

No picture for this week up yet, frankly, because I was too lazy to get my stuff together and take one today. I'm anxious. Just very anxious. I want this ball to get rolling! Every moment of the day is spent wondering if that little feeling or that little poke or that new/strange sensation means that something is starting. Something that will end in my having my little girl in my arms. Ughhh. Nothing to report yet. One of my best friends and I took a 4.5 mile walk today, and this evening I was able to feel Leta moving her head around very low in my pelvis for the first time. Literally. I was able to feel her head with my hands. Clear as day. It was insane and made me instantly teary-eyed. Hopefully, this is due to all the movin' and groovin', and you know that I'll be out there tomorrow for round 2. I'd love to get this thing going naturally by the end of the weekend! Wish me luck. :)

38 weeks

2009-02-15T09:47:00.000-08:00

So, I'm midway through week 38 and I'm looking at 9 days left. Finally hit that mark of feeling big and uncomfortable. I guess it was bound to happen at some point. I've been feeling crampy, like the first day of your period for a couple of days now. My mom says this is how it all starts, so we'll see. My doctor's been out of town on vacation in Tahoe for the past week and is getting back today, so the goal has been to make sure I don't go into labor until at least tonight (at the earliest). :) I've been beginning to wonder if I'll make it all the way till the 24th. Frankly, I'll be ok if I don't. I just have a few more things I need to take care of work-wise before I'm ready to be off, but I'm also so, absolutely ready to be done with this. I'm still a bit overwhelmed with the idea that I'll have a baby home with us in the next week, but I'm equally excited. I also feel like if I were to do as little as go for an aggressive walk that I might kickstart this whole thing. Let's hope. I might just be starting that regimen tomorrow morning.

37 weeks

2009-02-10T11:34:00.000-08:00

Holy Cow, I am SO pregnant!

As of today, I'm looking at exactly 2 weeks from my induction date (which is the day before my original due date). 2 weeks till my little girl's birthday. Talk about holy cow! More about thoughts on being induced in a moment. We had an ultrasound yesterday (I'll be 38 weeks tomorrow) to help determine her size and weight. They told us that she's 6 lbs 6 oz (I'm told that could be off by 1/2 lb either direction) and I'm measuring at exactly 38 weeks. Her heartbeat is right on and we got some fun u/s pictures of her chubby little cheeks and full lips! We also got a full on crotch shot, confirming once again that she is 100% girl! My blood pressure's been just fine this whole pregnancy, and I feel really good, aside from achy hips and the continuing sciatic problem. I've gained 22 lbs so far and haven't dealt with any swelling or puffiness. I woke up with some strange, period-like cramping in the middle of the night and again when I got up this morning, but nothing else to report. I do feel like my stomach is so big that it's going to explode, so the idea of just 2 weeks left really works for me.

This brings me to the issue of being induced. It's funny the reactions I get when I've told people that this is what our plan is. Most of our friends that have recently had children seem to fully understand where our doctor is coming from, and having just gone through giving birth to their first children too, are as eager as we are to just embrace whatever is going to get our daughter to us safely. We've also had our fair share of cool reactions, from both mothers involved and from those who feel like we should let things happen "naturally". The short and sweet of why our generally non-interventionist doctor would suggest that we might induce (again, only 1 day before our due date), is that after 40 weeks a placenta does not function at 100% anymore. Also, if the weight estimates are off from the last ultrasound that we did, as they can be, the baby can start to get so large that I will end up with a c-section, an episiotomy or the baby can be put into distress. He mentioned that after 20 years of delivering babies, he's only had a few still births, but it always leaves him wondering that if they just had gone ahead and induced the week of the due date, if the still birth could have been avoided. I'm due on a Wed and the hospital only does inductions on Tuesdays, so that's how we ended up with an induction date the day before. My doctor is not pressuring me into this and said that we can wait another week if we want to. It's just not his recommendation. Another reason some people are against inductions is that so often due dates are not accurate. Usually the mother is mistaken about the date of her last period, which leads to the wrong assignment of due date. This can lead to inducing up to two weeks earlier than the 40 weeks you think you're at. For me, I'm 100% positive of the date of the last day of my last period, and I and the baby have measured dead on throughout the entire pregnancy. I feel really confident that our dating is correct, so I'm not worried that we're taking her at 38 weeks instead of 40. Last concern is that inductions lead to c-sections. I spoke to my doctor about this in earnest, as I really do not want a c-section if it can be at all avoided. He said that the farther away from the due date (earlier) that an induction is performed, the more likely the incidence of c-sections due to the labor not progressing. He said that a day before the due date, the chance of the labor not progressing naturally from that point out is really low.

So there it is. Maybe I should be surprised that so many people have had such strong reactions to what really was a pretty simple decision for us to make when we weighed the pros and the cons. In the end, like any good parent, we won't do anything that isn't best for our little girl - regardless of how much I would like to be done with being pregnant. As of right now, we think this decision is best for us. Simple as that.

With that, we're on to the 2 week count-down!

36 wks

2009-02-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

Week 36, officially 9 mo pregnant! whoo woo! I can't explain how fast this past 9 mo has gone. At times the pregnancy seemed to linger on, but on the whole time has flown by. I'm again writing about the week in retrospect, so I'm actually looking at less than 3 weeks till the big day as of right now. Still no real change with Leta. She's still sitting high and although my cervix is thinning, I'm not dilated at all. I think I'm on my way to carrying to the very end, which is fine.

We started working on really finishing Leta's nursery this week and are pretty much finished. Having that weight off of my shoulders is huge and I feel much more prepared. I spend an entire day this weekend washing her clothes and getting them arranged by size. I got her closet organized and all we have left to do is hang a shelf or two and buy a floor rug. At this point, I just need to make appointments with pediatricians and pack our hospital bags. I can dot all of the i's and cross all of the t's, but I still can't really wrap my head around the fact that the end result of all of this preparation will be taking a very, tiny infant home with us permanently. Amazing.

Anyhow, here are a bunch of pics of her nursery....

:)

Date Set!

2009-01-27T13:03:00.001-08:00

We had our weekly doctor's check-up today and got some exciting news. One, my cervix has thinned - not too much, but the doctor seemed happy about it. Two, we scheduled my induction for February 23rd (if she hasn't come by then on her own), which means she'll be born on the 24th! Our anniversary is the 23rd, so that's quite a present for both of us!

She's measuring dead on and we have an ultrasound scheduled for two weeks from now to more accurately determine her size and weight. It's all happening so quickly now!!

35 weeks

2009-01-26T08:50:00.000-08:00

Back to basic, somewhat non-notable weeks :) Week 35 provided nothing really new - just a continuously growing, wiggling, kicking and punching little girl! I'm feeling more of the same - bit of an achy back, but otherwise pretty good. I do notice that I've had to slow down quite a bit when I'm out and about, but I'm certainly not unable to do the things I need to do. Work is finally starting to be a little more difficult - just all the up and down and bending, but it's not not doable.

We did our hospital walk-thru this weekend, which was informative, but after having visited some friends who had delivered there, probably not terribly necessary in retrospect. Just something to get us excited. I'm going a little crazy trying to keep straight all that we have left to do. We passed the "one month and counting" mark on Sunday, which felt pretty huge. I alternate between feeling like I've got a ton of time and realizing that I could have 2 weeks just as easily. That's nuts. I've got lists of what we still need for Leta and our hospital bags that I need to pack, and I don't think my mind stops running. I mainly just want her here in my arms - but at the same time am totally not ready. I'm almost ready, but not quite there yet.... Can you see the nuttiness in my brain??

Well, I'm officially stepping into my 9th month. Doctor's appointments are every week now and we're getting into the nitty gritty of actually having this baby. I can't believe it's here already. Time has really gone incredibly, incredibly fast. Our lives are about to change infinitely, and that can happen any day now.

34 weeks

2009-01-22T07:14:00.000-08:00

Week 34, in retrospect...

Let's see, what exciting things happened this week? As mentioned, we had our maternity pictures taken by Sarah - check all of them out over at her Brighthouse Photography Blog. We love them, and I think they will be a wonderful keepsake to mark the last few weeks while we were waiting for this little one to arrive. I got all of the baby shower gifts put away in the little miss's room and bought a diaper bag (ie. great yellow, leather handbag from Aldo that should do the job!). The crib came in and we got it all set up with the bedding, although, I need to strip it all and wash it - along with everything else in her room. I ordered her stroller and that should be here within the next week or so. We set up the pack-n-play in our bedroom, which we'll be using as a bassinet. That was pretty crazy, really. Suddenly the reality of the two of us becoming three shot into focus. I actually feel like if she came right now, we'd be able to get through the first couple of weeks for sure. That's a pretty good feeling.

I'm going from doctor's appointments every two weeks (which had been a progression from once a month) to every week starting with my next appointment. This prospect is pretty exciting to me as I think the "once a week's" will make the end of this go really quickly. I've started making lists of what we need to pack in the hospital bag and what we have left over to do before she gets here. While some people feel the urge to clean (nest), I'm feeling the pull to organize! There is still so much left to do, but then again, I'm not sure you're ever fully prepared. You just acclimate and accommodate as the need arises, I suppose.

Leta's getting big these days, weighing in over 5 lbs now. They say she has very little room to move around and that I might notice a decrease in her movements and activities accordingly, but, really, they've stayed the same. Either she's not as big as they're saying she is or she's just really strong and determined! I'm still getting the waterbed belly effect and she's getting into pretty consistent patterns of activity and non-activity. As far as I go, I was told that my iron was on the low side, and am now taking iron supplements to thwart anemia. Hopefully this won't jack up my system, as iron is infamous for. I've been downing dried prunes in hopes of keeping everything at a nice level of normal :) I thought the low iron could be why I've been so ridiculously tired lately, but after taking the supplements for a week now, I think I'm just really tired. She's taking a lot out of me, with all that growing and getting cute. My back is still bothering me off and on - the whole sciatic issue, but it's not everyday. More than anything, I wish I could just sleep away everyday, all day.

Belly pictures!!

2009-01-15T10:25:00.000-08:00

My sweet friend Sarah is an incredibly talented photographer and TJ and I asked her to take some pics of our little Leta when she's firstborn. Sarah also suggested that we should do some maternity pictures, and we thought, why not? We did our session yesterday at a pretty park in Deerfield Beach. The weather was perfect - bright and blue - and aside from nearly being assaulted by squirrels, we had a great time. This is a little teaser photo that Sarah posted on her blog (see my blog roll - brighthouse photography)....

Can't wait to see the rest of them!!!

33 weeks

2009-01-13T11:10:00.000-08:00

This has been an insanely busy and really all-around great week. First and foremost, Leta's doing terrific. Last doctor's appt. 2 weeks ago she was measuring at 32 1/2 weeks and at today's visit (I'm 34 weeks tomorrow) she's measuring at 35 weeks. I haven't gained a pound in the interim, so it seems that the little girl is growing like crazy! I've gained 17 lbs so far and am feeling really big and round. My stomach is relatively comfortable, but I've been dealing with sciatic problems in my back (my upper butt really). My hips are just constantly achy and I have sharp pains on a pretty regular basis. Bending over is really uncomfortable and I look like an old woman walking at times. Leta moves around all the time and she is my entire stomach. It's absolutely insane looking. I call it my waterbed belly. Big waves of arms, legs, elbows, knees and god knows what else rolling around in there! It's pretty cool to see all in all and it makes me fall in love with this baby more and more everyday. I can feel so much, but I just can't wait to hold her in my arms and touch all of those feet and hands!!

I also had my baby shower this past weekend, put on by all of the lovely women in my and Leta's life. It was simple and nature themed, which was exactly what I was hoping for. The ladies were treated to decadent desserts, rich cheeses, coffee, teas, hot chocolate and champagne punch. I had requested that there be no cheesy baby shower games, which they respected. In the end, the one "game" that was played was pretty neat. A board was set up with my family's baby pictures and TJ's family's baby pictures and a sonogram of Leta. All of the guests had to try to figure out who was who and the winners won some pretty potted flowers. It was very sweet and we got a lot of wonderful and generous gifts to get started with Leta. We're really more than blessed. Here are some pics from the party!

32 weeks

2009-01-13T11:07:00.000-08:00

Because of the massive awesomeness of the pictures I had of Leta, I never got around to posting any of myself for the week. So, voila`...

32 weeks

2009-01-04T16:08:00.000-08:00

Our New Year couldn't be off to a more spectacular start! We had a regular ultrasound appointment this week, and were both pretty excited about getting to take a peek at our little girl. We haven't had an ultrasound since week 20, so this has been 3 long months in coming. We were actually a bit curious to see if we were going to be able to get a good look, as she's so much bigger now and all pretzeled in there! We didn't have a great experience last appointment - the tech rushed through what she was doing and gave us one blurry picture at the end of the appointment, so we were determined to get decent pictures this time. We had a good rapport going with the tech this time, and we were getting awesome little pics like this one - straight up her nose with her tongue sticking out ...

Then she casually says, "Oh, have you guys ever seen the 4D pictures?". When we say no, she pushes a button - this magic button that apparently can just be turned on, and voila` - we got to meet our daughter!

We are very proud to post the first pictures of our beautiful little girl's face.....
(and ps - the knobby thing on her face right where her eye should be in some of the pictures is the umbilical chord - not a googly eye!)

Needless to say, my face was tear-soaked by the end of the appointment. She completely has TJ's top lip, which blew us away to be able to see already. We got to see her make all sorts of little faces, stick her tongue out and throw her hand up over her face. She's pretty nuzzled down in my uterus, so we weren't able to get a full-on, face pic, but I was more than happy with these!

I'm so happy and excited that there aren't words to properly express the feelings....

2008 in review....

2008-12-31T07:03:00.000-08:00

Things done / experienced / accomplished:

Kissed my wonderful husband on New Year's
Drove to North Carolina and celebrated my first wedding anniversary
Started two new jobs that I love
Planned and participated in my first big charity event
Celebrated a crazy St Patrick's Day with the closest of friends
Found out (officially) that I have severe allergies and started treating them
Got back in shape
Turned 28 in Key West
Went to my first drag queen show with the aide of many margaritas
Found out I was pregnant the day after I got home
Stopped the allergy treatments - and the margaritas...
Started to blog again
Spent the 4th of July with morning sickness
Heard my baby's heartbeat for the first time
Readjusted my entire life-view
Fell even more in love with my husband
Saw our baby for the first time
Named our daughter
Showed the line by myself and was praised by the national sales manager
Bought our first house
Started to accept losing that good shape
Had our first - and hopefully only - brush with cancer
Paid two mortgages
Started setting up a nursery
Realized we're not really dog people
Found hope and joy in financially stressful times
Made best friends with my husband
Bought my first pair of maternity jeans
Drank non-alcoholic wine by the fire in the evenings with my husband, talking about our future
Celebrated our first Thanksgiving and Christmas in our new house
Will ring in the New Year tonight with friends, a healthy baby in my belly, and the love of my life by my side

quick note...

2008-12-30T09:56:00.001-08:00

Just a quick note, more for my remembrance than yours. Today is the last day of 31 weeks. We had a doctor's appt. today - we're going to every 2 weeks from this point out! Leta is measuring right at 32 1/2 weeks, and her heart is beating nice and strong, and she's head down! Yay! The doctor said at this point in the pregnancy that shouldn't change either. Double Yay!!

Oh, sweet baby love :)

31 weeks

2008-12-29T05:57:00.000-08:00

Hello. I am HUGE.

Holy cow, really. I feel like I've doubled in size in the past 2 weeks. This is the week that I've really started to feel the weight I'm carrying around as well. I've gained about 15 lbs at this point, and it's all pulling on my lower back, which leaves me feeling pretty great by the end of the day. I notice that I'm taking really deep breaths all the time, as if I'm short of breath, and I think that's due to her putting the crunch on my lungs. Also, the days of sitting up nice and straight seem like they're long gone for me. I seem to only be comfortable when I'm leaning back, stretching that tummy out as much as possible.

Christmas was this past week, and it was great, but really, really tiring. We spent Christmas Eve with my in-laws, then Christmas morning at home to ourselves, Christmas afternoon with my parents in, then down to Miami for our annual family Christmas reunion. I'm not sure how we can keep this pace next year with a 10 mo. old. At the same time, everyone will want to see her, and it's the only time each year that all of my extended family comes together. It seems like it might be worth the sacrifice of our sanity for the day.

On another note, I think I'm battling a possible cold. It's going back and forth right now - sometimes it's winning and sometimes I seem to be coming out on top. I've got the classic scratchy throat thing happening, and with only 8 1/2 weeks of this pregnancy left to go (CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!??), I'm just praying (begging) that I can stay healthy.

We've got a couple of doctor's appts. this week, including our next ultrasound! I'm so excited. Our last u/s was at 20 weeks, so I can't even begin to imagine how different she'll be at 32! My doctor said we'll have one more after this around week 36 to check her size and weight going into that last little stretch. Time is just flying by at this point.

Much more to come next week, I'm sure :)

30 weeks, continued :)

2008-12-23T07:37:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas, from The Poole's - all 3 of us...

I got to spend some time this week with some of our favorite friends from near and far and will be spending Christmas with both sides of our family. More to come next week...
In the meantime, here's one of me hanging out with some of my favorite fellow preggo's!

30 WEEKS!

2008-12-17T15:35:00.000-08:00

LOOK! She's HUGE!

She's 3 lbs and almost 16 inches long and growing, growing, growing!

I'm so excited :)

29 weeks

2008-12-17T05:07:00.000-08:00

I've taken to writing these posts in retrospect of the week, meaning in reality, I'm 30 weeks today. I'm really sincerely excited about the big 3-0 (!), and the count-down is really, really on at this point, but I'll try to stick to posting about this past week for now...

Week 29 was another week with not a lot to tell. I do feel like I'm visibly getting larger almost everyday, and I've got an extremely active girl in there :) Leta's movin' and shakin' ALL the time, which scares me a bit for when she's on the the outside. They say that the baby keeps to it's schedule that it kept in the womb, and it seems like little Leta-bug takes very little downtime.

We had our childbirth class this past weekend, and I think it was fully worth doing. We opted for the one-day class, as, with our schedules, it's nearly impossible to coordinate a class that meets more than twice. I don't think we missed out on any crucial info, pushing it all into one day, and it was kind of nice to be around so many other pregnant couples. My other reason for choosing the one-day option was that after reading the description of the classes, it seemed like the several day classes (6 2 hour classes and what have you) were set up that way partially to focus on getting the dad ready for what was going to be happening in the delivery room. TJ has been there and done that and is really the least of my concerns when it comes to that aspect of it all. It's how we both adapt to being parents of a newborn when she comes home that will be more interesting :) It is comforting to know that I'm not going to have to deal with giving birth AND a husband that is squeamish or looking like he's grossed out at the same time. He was able to ask really thoughtful questions (esp. about the pain management aspect, which is what we were really interested in figuring out) when we were in the class, and I walked away feeling ready to go into this with him.

On the big "pain-management" front, we've settled on our decision to go with an epidural for the delivery and nothing else. There are other iv drugs available, etc, but we only feel comfortable with the epidural. There seem to be side effects for the baby with the other options and we're not comfortable with those. I am going to attempt to fully get into the midst of active labor before we start the epidural, just to make sure it doesn't slow down the process of early labor, and we think we're going to try to stay home for the whole early labor portion if at all possible. We'll see how this all goes once there. :) All told, the baby will be born because of me or despite me and my efforts!

I'm in this weird space in the pregnancy right now where I alternate between freaking out that the baby will be here so soon and we're not ready and desperately wanting her here now. I'm still leaning toward the "not ready" part more, and I keep trying to reinforce to myself that we have time. 10 weeks or a bit less of time really. Time. But, the planner in me looks at all the t's yet to be crossed and i's yet to be dotted and hopes that we're preparing as well as we should be. ugh.

In other news, baby shower invites have gone out and rsvp's have started coming in. The shower's Jan 11th at my mother-in-law's house, and I just can't wait to see all of my closest girlfriends together again. I had the feeling that it would never happen again after the wedding, and I guess I just wasn't thinking far enough in advance to this circumstance :) Leta will have the most wonderful women in her life and she doesn't even know it!

We're quickly approaching Christmas - the last Christmas of our lives without a child. Everything is about to change so drastically. It's crazy. A good thing, but incomprehensible fully till experienced at best.

On to the 30's!

28 weeks

2008-12-11T09:51:00.000-08:00

This has been a busy week for both me and Leta. She's growing by leaps and bounds at this point, and all of that growth is absolutely draining me of energy. I'm so sluggish (welcome back first trimester), I can't even begin to explain. My tummy's getting bigger and bigger at this point too, and she moves constantly. It now feels like massage rollers from the inside out and I can feel distinct little baby parts. It's pretty cool.

I had the infamous glucose test this week. I had to fast for 12 hours and then drink this orange flavored drink, which really wasn't too bad. I was expecting it to be much worse than it turned out to be. I had 4 viles of blood drawn and I get my results tomorrow, supposedly. The doctor checked Leta out and said she seems to be head down already. Hopefully he's right. She's still got lots of time to move if she needs to, but I'd rather have one less thing to worry about. Her heart is healthy and strong and she's measuring just right. I've managed to gain some weight this past month as well, so he was really happy about that. I've put on 13 lbs total so far, and I'm pretty happy with the slow and steady weight gain. People can finally tell that I'm pregnant now, which has made me feel a bit better. I don't feel like I look like a stumpy fat girl walking around anymore.

TJ and I have our childbirth class on Saturday, which should be interesting. I've been reading my breast feeding book in the meantime, trying to prepare for what that will entail. I'm definitely game, and I hope it goes well. The invitations for the baby shower have gone out, so I'm told :) My lovely lady friends have been fast at work planning everything and I'm pretty excited to see what they've come up with. Soon soon!

We still like to party...

2008-12-07T10:38:00.000-08:00

Oh, Leta, your mom and dad are such dorks...

But, we have a lot of fun! Last night, despite feeling extremely exhausted, I dragged myself to a friend's b-day moustache party with TJ - and am I glad I did! We had so much fun, and I actually stayed out after midnight which is something of a bygone era at this point. I was about this close to staying home and having TJ go solo when I realized that in 3 months, the ability for the two of us to run out for a few hours to a party downtown will be a joke. I chomped on an apple, put on some mascara and donned a lovely "movie-star" moustache (that's what the packaging called it). We had a blast.

Of course, not one to leave my daughter out of the mix, I made sure Leta had some moustache fun too. God I wish that we hadn't already had our Christmas cards made...

27 weeks

2008-12-02T08:45:00.000-08:00

She broke me. It's over. This child has gotten so flippin' big over the past week, that I absolutely crumbled and succumbed to the one thing I've been DREADING. I bought - - - (dramatic pause -maybe dramatic music as well), maternity jeans. Freaking stretchy pants. UGH!!!!!!! I can still fit into 2 pairs of my pants - one delightfully shown in the pictures from week 26 and one pair of jeans. The jeans fit because they are so low rise - however, the downside is that they are so low rise that I spend most of the day trying to pull them up so as to not torture others with the sight of my pregnant lady butt crack. These particular jeans are also too long. So long that I can't wear shoes in the chilly weather we've been having, and, in addition, not nice enough to wear "out" - that is if we make it "out". So, long story short, TJ and I found ourselves in a maternity store (yes, my husband is that great that he went with me!), and I tried on said maternity jeans, and was so overcome with how freaking comfortable they were, I bought them immediately.

People, I have maternity wear.

I will say that I made it to the 7 month mark without the need, and - technically- I can still wear my regular clothes. But, it is what it is.

In other news, here is a picture of me REALLY enjoying 1 of the Non-Alcoholic St. Pauli Girl's in my very special coozy that my hubby bought me. We spent all day Sunday watching football, and I got to have a "beer" with TJ while we relaxed after the craziness of Thanksgiving.

26 weeks

2008-11-26T08:51:00.000-08:00

Last week was uneventful on the physical front. Just plowing through the weeks :)

On the general baby front, we started putting together Leta's room! TJ got the walls all painted and we finally hung blinds. We just need to finish the baseboard, then people can start buying us furniture! :) Also, we finally tackled the ultimate baby-induced torture of registering for the baby shower. I've been dreading this event ever since we registered for the wedding. I know some people must really look forward to this event - love it even, but the thought of wandering around a crowded babies-r-us, trying to pick out all the things we need - when we really have no idea what those things are - overwhelming. Anyhow, 2 hours later, I think TJ and I accomplished the task at hand. I guess we won't really know until Leta's here and we see how everything works, but we did the best we could.

25 weeks

2008-11-17T19:22:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here typing, unable to breathe, due to my second major allergy attack of the season. Both have happened on trips to Orlando - apparently there' s some tree or something up there that my system just isn't having. Fortunately I can take plain old sudafed, according to my doctor, or else I wouldn't be able to sleep at all. I was receiving allergy shots for my "severe allergies" and was on my way to having a sinus surgery to correct several issues I have going on in there before I found out I was pregnant. So, it's one more allergy season to make it through before I can get that all repaired and hopefully stop dealing with the chronic sinus infections that have plagued me since college. Other than that, I feel just fine. As mentioned, I went to Orlando on a girl's birthday weekend celebration and had a really nice time. Actually had my first non-alc beer while out to dinner (St Pauli Girl N/A), which was surprisingly tasty, especially when compared to the non-alcoholic wine I've had, which is really terrible. I think Leta was a bit thrown off by the traveling and she wasn't herself. She's on such a regular schedule, so it was kind of a bummer missing our "play-times". I missed our time together ;)

As mentioned, I'm feeling good and still working out. I am definitely getting bigger and the tummy's feeling really tight all the time. I still can't wrap my mind around the idea that I'll be easily double this size in the next 2 months. It just doesn't seem physically possible. Even though I think it's more genetics than anything, I'm lotioning up the belly daily - desperately hoping to avoid stretch marks. I'm hoping that since the weight gain has been really slow and steady, I'll be lucky to avoid them in the end, and, on the genetic front, my mom doesn't have any. My belly button doesn't look like it's popping out anytime soon either. It is stretching out further and further though. It's like this big open crater now. I've never seen the back of my belly button so clearly before -weird. Leta's about a pound and 1/2 this week and, according to my books, she's too big to do somersaults and flips anymore. I'm starting to notice the same type of movements in the same places. If I had my guess, I'd say she's face-up and head-down. I could be totally wrong, and I guess I'll find out at my next ultrasound at the end of December. She completely favors my right-side, as she has this entire pregnancy. I'm often clearly lop-sided leaving no questions as to where she's hanging out :)

Other than that, we went to a large engagement party for the daughter of good friends of my in-laws last night. Basically a ton of people my in-law's age who have known TJ since he was young, mainly. I am constantly amazed at the absolutely terrible things that people will say to you when you're pregnant. Frankly, I'm just tired of the constant commentary on my body and how big or small people think I am, the comments on what I'm eating or not, etc etc. 3 more months, and the commentary on my mothering skills can begin. yay!

Realization that in just 3 months we'll have a little, chubby baby girl hit me like a ton of bricks this week - which led to buying cute new outfits! One for mom and one for dad. And yes, those are teal leggings and striped legwarmers! I can't wait to have a cuddly little baby to dress up in them!

mommy's little lady ;)

daddy loves me.

24 weeks

2008-11-10T15:34:00.000-08:00

Mommy and Leta are on their way to the gym to get their work-out on! :) (Please excuse the super messy bedroom behind me! I need to take that more into consideration before taking these pictures! ha!)

I'm mid-way through week 24 and feeling pretty good. A couple of new "pregnancy unpleasantries" that have popped up this week include leaky boobs - expected, but unexpected at the same time and kinda gross honestly, and hemorrhoids, which are awesome. I've had a relatively easy pregnancy, but I'm not thrilled that out of everything, this is the thing that I'm getting to experience. Let's just say, in the list of "unpleasantries", this is extremely unpleasant. I mistakingly thought this was something that happened only after birth. BE WARNED. This is not true. It can happen to you. Incidentally, there's nothing you can do to prevent this, but whatever.

So, I committed to being open about all of this here, more to keep an accurate record for myself than anything, as this is my only "journal" of this pregnancy that I'm keeping. Accordingly, sorry if all of this is more than you ever wanted to know about me and my body systems. I'm just keepin' it real. :)

Aside from the previously mentioned "snags" I'm doing well this week and Miss Leta continues to get bigger and bigger and stronger and stronger. It seems that Leta's starting to respond to TJ's voice, which he's thrilled about. We don't know this for sure, it could just be a coincidence, but our books were saying that she can actually hear his voice better than mine, as she hears deeper voices and sounds more clearly. Twice now (last night and this morning) she's started kicking whenever he starts talking to her. It's pretty cool, and he was definitely feeling more connected to her than ever.

23 wks

2008-11-05T10:59:00.000-08:00

So, according to my baby book, this week was the first week of the 6th month - not sure how that works mathematically, but whatever! :) Still feeling really great and not much in the way of changes, aside from kicks and punches getting stronger and stronger. I had a baby appointment yesterday and her little heartbeat was going nuts at 166 a minute! Still normal, but even the doctor said she must have been really excited about something. :) I also got the news that I need to gain more weight - which is probably the first and only time I will ever hear that from a doctor! I apparently should be between 10 and 15 lbs gained as of right now and I'm only at 8. My weight gain hasn't changed since last month's visit and Leta's measuring just fine, so that means she's gaining and I'm actually losing. Not sure how this is happening. I apparently need to add more calories into the diet, but I'm eating till I'm full at meals - certainly not letting myself go hungry or dieting by any means. Anyways, my new goal is 3 lbs a month for the rest of the pregnancy. Should be reasonably easy ;) If that's the worst of the issues, it's not too bad.

22 wks

2008-10-27T07:53:00.000-07:00

So, this week has seen the kicks and punches from Leta move upwards in my tummy, to the point where I'm now feeling them just above my belly button. In fact, last night I was getting a kick (or punch) in my lower left abdomen and a kick (or punch) above my belly button on the right side at the same time. Meaning - she's really stretched out in there. In fact she weighs about a pound and she's about a foot long! All of this seems absolutely insane when I try to wrap my mind around it. The fact that in just 4 months she'll be here is just nuts.

I'm still feeling really good, but at the same time looking forward to having this baby in our arms and out of my belly.Feeling her move around is amazing, but I think I'd prefer to hang with her on the outside... I can't wait to have my body back to myself :)

21 wks

2008-10-20T20:44:00.000-07:00

This week has seen more growth from the little one, but not much more in the way of physical change on my side. I've heard that the changes come in spurts. That I'll have this initial "pop"; then nothing for awhile; then another big pop; then plateau for a bit, etc. So, maybe that's what's happening.

On her end, she's the size of a carrot now, if you can believe it! She weighs almost a pound and is about 10 1/2 inches long (head to toe). Little lady's packing on the poundage! ;)

19- 20wks...Half-way There!!!

2008-10-16T08:34:00.000-07:00

We've been moving into our new house over the past 2 (almost 3 wks??) now, and I've fallen behind in my weekly updating. We closed on Sept 25, and since we don't have a renter for the condo yet, we were able to stay there while we made improvements to the new place. I'm so excited to have a new, larger space for Leta to come into. It's got a big back yard that we're already envisioning swing-sets and slip-n-slide's, and we're on a cul-de-sac, which will be awesome for playtime in the front yard. Also the "A-rated" elementary school is in our neighborhood and within walking distance. We're now finally living in the house, with just a few more boxes and a bunch of cleaning to go, so normal life is slowly returning.

In the past two weeks, Leta's been cranking! We went for another ultrasound at the beginning of the month and found that she was right on target - 11oz and about 10 1/2 inches long. Her heart and other essential organs look great, as well. She was upside down the entire u/s and had her head buried down low on the right side. She seems to favor this position as my stomach is lop-sided half of the time. Leta's been sitting so low that it was often extrememly uncomfortable - to the point where sometimes it would hurt to lift my legs. In the past two weeks this has subsided a bit as I think everything's come up a bit. It doesn't look it in the pictures, but it feels a thousand times better.

By this week, her kicks and punches have become really strong, where TJ can easily feel them on a regular basis, and I've noticed that she has certain times of day that she really gets going. This is kind of the fun part. Each night around 10:30 we get about 1/2 hr to 45 min of Leta kicking time. TJ and I kind of sprawl out on the couch and he gets a chance to leave his hand on my belly and catch up with his girl.

I'm feeling pretty darn good, although I still get tired more easily. I keep thinking I need to enjoy this time of small belly and energy, cause it can't last forever! I'm still trying to get to the gym and feeling good there as well. I had gained 7 lbs at our last appointment overall (not bad for being 1/2 way there) and I think I'm up to about 9 now. My only goal is to keep it slow and steady and mainly baby. God knows I don't need more butt and thighs! Ok.... so....

Are you ready for the MASSIVE changes my little belly is undergoing?? I thought little Leta was making herself known in week 18 - then came week 19...

Then, HOLY COW, came week 20 - the big 5 mo / half-way mark, and boom....

I'm thinking there's no way that people can't know I'm pregnant now, but I've been surprised that only one person has noticed and said something. Can it be that I just look like I've gained THAT much weight?? Oh geez.

Hopefully, my updates will return to their regularly scheduled weekly time, for my "record-keeping" sake if anything. All in all, the Poole family is doing very well.

18 wks

2008-09-29T08:09:00.000-07:00

Oh! There she is!

We're still waiting to be able to feel her on the outside, but she's pretty active on the whole.

Open Letter to my daughter...

2008-09-28T19:16:00.000-07:00

Dear Leta,

This has been a busy week for mommy and daddy to say the least. We bought a house and are in the process of fixing this and that and moving in. I'm sorry for all the times I've over-heated us both, waited too long to feed both of us, breathed in paint fumes, and crawled around on the ground - no doubt making you uncomfortable, which is expressed by you kicking me immediately. But, it must be done. This house is the first house you'll ever remember. The house that we'll take you home from the hospital to, the one you'll have your first baths, naps and meals in. This will be where you learn to crawl, then walk, and where we'll hear you utter your first words. Your first memories of your life will be created here, so, you see, it's an important house. It's a big deal for us to get it just right for you. You've already got your own room and closet, and we've already picked out where your furniture will go. Every choice we make when it comes to this house, is done with you in mind. You're so loved already little girl.

I really love our new house, but I know it won't be truly complete until we have you in it with us. So, until then, please continue to disregard the discomforts and inconveniences, and I'll try to keep them minimal. We'll get this new house all set up and perfect for you, and one day, you'll have to let us know what you think. See you before too long ;)

17 wks.

2008-09-21T17:22:00.000-07:00

This pic is at 17 1/2 wks exactly. Starting to show :)

Big Sprout ;)

2008-09-15T15:41:00.000-07:00

She's an avocado this week!

I'm really starting to feel this little avocado too. It's gotten to the point where it's uncomfortable to pull my legs up to my chest (if I'm curled up on the couch or in bed), and I have to be careful the way I move side to side and stretch. Not so much a little sprout anymore :)

16 weeks

2008-09-15T10:36:00.000-07:00

Ok, so honestly, I think I'm actually starting to show a bit - really! No, really! :) At least, TJ and I can see a difference. I've got a little beer gut called Leta :) My bladder must be directly under my uterus, because in the morning, before I've had the chance to go to the bathroom, my belly really pops out. We can clearly feel the top and sides of my uterus, and that's pretty cool. It basically goes away as soon as I go to the bathroom, but it's neat to feel even for a bit.

I'm still waiting to be able to feel the baby move. According to all the books, etc, it should be anytime now. I sometimes think I feel the "flutter" or "bubbles" that they talk about, but then I usually second guess whether or not it was just my stomach or something else. I'm pretty sure that I'm probably starting to feel Leta moving around, but I guess you can't know for sure until it's a little bit stronger. I know TJ can't wait until he can feel something. Just a few more weeks!

I've put on 4 lbs, which I think is on target for being 4 mo. along. Tt's still hard to watch the numbers go up on the scale. I'm trying to consistently get to the gym, and I feel pretty good when I'm there. Other than that, I'm currently enjoying the beginning of allergy season! I had a horrible weekend with allergies (we were in Orlando and something there just attacked my sinuses), and I now have the start of a sinus infection. I contacted my OB today and was told that I can take plain sudafed, so at least it's something. I was supposed to have sinus surgery in July, but then with finding out I was pregnant, that's on hold for awhile, along with my allergy shots and everything else we were doing to combat this problem. It could be a long allergy season :(

And finally this week, we've broken down and allowed ourselves to start buying some little things (mainly clothes) here and there for Leta. We ventured into Baby Gap (which I've been trying to avoid due to its cuteness!) and I got her the most adorable blue sundress - because girls can wear blue too!!!!! - and a pair of little soft shorts with pink,white, blue and green fish all over them. Flipping adorable. We're trying to restrain ourselves, but we've picked up a few other things too. I just can't help myself. :)

Sonogram #2 and the BIG REVEAL!!!

2008-09-08T15:55:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, our little one is perfectly healthy!!! We, of course, assume happy as well, but I guess we'll see soon enough. Baby's 4oz and right on target with size, weight and heartbeat. Here are some of our favorite pics from today...

Just saying hello :)

Sweet little nose and lips :)

Perfect little profile

2 tiny feet and 10 tiny toes!!

AND! finally - the BIG news! We're super excited to announce that we're having a little girl!!!! Everyone we know, with the exception of my sister, has guessed that we're having a boy, so it was quite a surprise :) Last visit, the tech told us she thought it was a boy, but she must have been seeing the umbilical chord, cause this little girl definitely doesn't have any "goods"! We're very happy, and I've got images of baby bikinis floating around in my head!

We're planning on naming her Leta Eve. Leta means "glad" and Eve (Evelyn really) is both one of my grandmother's and one of TJ's grandmother's name.

Ahhhhh, sweet, sweet baby love ;)

It's a....

2008-09-06T17:45:00.000-07:00

APPLE!

Here's my preggo update for week 15:

"How Your Baby's Growing:

Your growing baby now measures about 4 inches long, crown to rump, and weighs in at about 2 1/2 ounces (about the size of an apple). She's busy moving amniotic fluid through her nose and upper respiratory tract, which helps the primitive air sacs in her lungs begin to develop. Her legs are growing longer than her arms now, and she can move all of her joints and limbs. Although her eyelids are still fused shut, she can sense light. If you shine a flashlight at your tummy, for instance, she's likely to move away from the beam. There's not much for your baby to taste at this point, but she is forming taste buds. Finally, if you have an ultrasound this week, you may be able to find out whether your baby's a boy or a girl! (Don't be too disappointed if it remains a mystery, though. Nailing down your baby's sex depends on the clarity of the picture and on your baby's position. He or she may be modestly curled up or turned in such a way as to "hide the goods.")"

15 wks

2008-09-06T17:06:00.000-07:00

As I'm writing this, I'm at 15 1/2 weeks and looking forward to our next sonogram on Monday! Hopefully they'll be able to tell us if we're expecting a boy or girl :)

This week has been really tiring with a ton of work and the whole buying a house process. We had the inspection this week and I got started packing up our lives in the condo. I spent nearly all of today cleaning to prepare for prospective renters to come in this next week (hopefully!). Our closing is the 25th, so incredibly fast approaching. I'm just thankful we'll be settled before the holidays and before I'm getting big ;)

As far as getting big goes, you can see that I haven't yet. I'm caught in this weird space of wanting to see more of this pregnancy physically and not really wanting my body to change at all. I think if I could feel the baby move, which is a possibility in the next week or so, I'd be happy.

Emotionally and physically I'm doing really well. I've had a few moments of felling really overwhelmed with all that's going on, but nothing a good cry didn't fix :) Physically, aside from feeling really chunky, I've had more energy and felt even more like myself this week. It's a pleasant return after the first trimester of utter and complete fatigue. The headaches are still off and on and can usually be solved by massive amounts of sleep. I've been trying to get to the gym, but this past week has been a challenge with my work schedule. There's always next week. I guess not everything has changed in my life.... :)

14 wks

2008-09-03T06:39:00.000-07:00

So, I'm at the close of my 14th week, and it's been fairly uneventful aside from the constant headaches I've started to get. This is not fun. We're talking 5, 6, 7 hour headaches, that nothing - NOTHING - gets rid of. These aren't migraines, and I know a lot of women get those during pregnancy, so I can't fully complain. However, they are very uncomfortable, and, as far as I can tell, completely unnecessary. Any day that I avoid one of these, I count as a gift, after the past 2 weeks of fun fun fun! Other than that, I'm feeling really good. I'm only feeling exhausted after being up and going for a good while. I kind of laugh, because I feel silly being so tired sometimes. I'm obviously not carrying around a lot of extra weight, but I guess the little sprout strips more out of me than I expect.

We're due for a second sonogram next Monday, and there's a very good chance they'll be able to tell us what we're having for sure. I'll be just shy of 16 weeks and I think they usually say that they can tell between 15 and 20 weeks. We are absolutely DYING to know!!!

In other news, we're in the process of buying a house and trying to get our condo rented out right now as well. I definitely have had some moments of being completely overwhelmed, including a good breakdown cry on Sunday. All of the extra hormones mixed with my normal anxiety is tough on occasion. We'll get there, but I will say that I'm very much looking forward to November when we're settled and just hopping through the holidays.

little nothin'...

2008-08-27T15:16:00.000-07:00

Saw this and it totally reminded me of me - I had to laugh...

Second Trimester - finally! :)

2008-08-27T15:01:00.000-07:00

Yay!! for the start of my second trimester!!! This is the prego-update I got today. I thought it was pretty awesome...

How your baby's growing:

This week's big developments: Your baby can now squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his thumb! Thanks to brain impulses, his facial muscles are getting a workout as his tiny features form one expression after another. His kidneys are producing urine, which he releases into the amniotic fluid around him — a process he'll keep up until birth. He can grasp, too, and if you're having an ultrasound now, you may even catch him sucking his thumb.

In other news: Your baby's stretching out. From head to bottom, he measures 3 1/2 inches — about the size of lemon— and he weighs 1 1/2 ounces. His body's growing faster than his head, which now sits upon a more distinct neck. By the end of this week, his arms will have grown to a length that's in proportion to the rest of his body. (His legs still have some lengthening to do.) He's starting to develop an ultra-fine, downy covering of hair, called lanugo, all over his body. Your baby's liver starts making bile this week — a sign that it's doing its job right — and his spleen starts helping in the production of red blood cells. Though you can't feel his tiny punches and kicks yet, your little pugilist's hands and feet (which now measure about 1/2 inch long) are more flexible and active.

Changes...

2008-08-25T09:50:00.000-07:00

I was going on about my day today, and had to stop and smile at all the little baby things that are creeping into our kitchen, rooms and closets. It's amazing how much of life already revolves around this little sprout. :)

Catching up... weeks 12 & 13

2008-08-22T09:20:00.000-07:00

13 wks

12 wks

So, above are my past two weeks, rounding out the last of my first trimester. I think I look F.A.T. in the 12 week picture, but that may be due to a few extra cookies and some tummy issues I had that week, more than anything! I am starting to notice a significant (to me) difference in my waist-size. I'm still wearing all of my clothes comfortably, but have got a little baby bump brewing. Seeing that the baby will be growing in high gear in the next weeks to come, I'm thinking we'll have a pop before too long!

Baby was treated to its first concert last night. Smashing Pumpkins were in town, and TJ and I were both super excited to see them for the first time (better late than never)! Once the show started, I did start to worry a bit. I know the baby can't really hear anything outside of the womb right now, but it was extremely loud, and of course, there was all the (various types of) smoke. I was struggling between trying to keep the belly covered (ear muffs!) and keeping my nose covered. As silly as it seems, I also don't really have the stamina that I would normally have, and after 3 hours of standing (1 before the show started and 2 of the show itself), I had to go over to the side of the amphitheater and drink some water and sit down. It might be awhile before I go to another outdoor show :)

I am feeling much better these days. I'm starting to get my appetite back, but in the same token, I also have strong cravings for and against things on a nearly daily basis, making food decisions difficult. Things could be worse, of course, so no real complaints. I've been a bit of a slacker with the gym lately and am feeling the bug to get back to it. Still figuring out my pace on a daily basis, but I'm more excited than ever about this little one.

First Picture!!

2008-08-20T11:23:00.000-07:00

YAY! The long anticipated look at the little sprout has finally arrived! We went in for the first part of our prenatal screening this morning and got a good long look at the little one. :)

We have one more appointment in 3 weeks for the follow-up to all the tests. This visit showed no signs of Down's, or any other concerns for that matter (YAY!). In order to look for the soft markers for Down's, they had to get 3 specific pictures of the baby, and baby was most certainly not cooperating. It took a good 15 minutes to get the baby finally turn the direction we needed, and to give us a picture with it's chin up, rather than down against it's chest. The upside, was that we got to watch it kick around for about 15 minutes. We were able to watch the heart beat, see the spine, and see 2 perfect arms and 2 perfect legs with tiny little fingers and toes! We could even see it's bladder and stomach! The baby was bringing it's little hands up to it's face, and stretching out it's legs. So amazing!! We were also given a pretty solid guess on the baby's sex, but we'll wait to tell everyone till our next appointment, when we can be 100% sure. haha!

We're on cloud nine right now, to say the least :)

11 wks.

2008-08-17T20:10:00.000-07:00

So, thanks to a busy work week and my obsession with the Olympics, I'm just now adding the 11 weeks update, and I'm about 1/2 through week 12. Week 11 was really uneventful from a physical standpoint. I'm not really dealing with any nausea anymore, relating to eating or not eating, and I've had not necessarily more energy, as much as not so much fatigue. The downside of this upside is that I forget to take care of myself the way I should. The nausea, although extremely unpleasant, reminded me to take time out and eat small snacks throughout the day. The fatigue reminded me to take it a bit easier. I'm feeling good, so I'll get really involved with what I'm doing, turn around, and realize that it's been 6 hours since I last ate, and oh - maybe that's why I'm suddenly dizzy. Or, I'll do a bit too much lifting or general hustling and bustling at work outside in the heat, and dehydrate the heck out of myself. I'm still adjusting to my new limitations to say the least.

I'm also adjusting to some of the emotional end of all of this. As we don't have any other kids, this is a pretty drastic change for me. I would say for both of us, but that wouldn't be true, yet. My life has been turned upside down since the very moment I found out I was pregnant. TJ's not really looking at any major changes till the little one gets here. It is sometimes a frustrating feeling to get the sense that I'm carrying all of the responsibility right now. That I have to change my eating habits, drinking habits, where I go, how long I stay, what activities I get to do and not do - even down to how many times I have to get up at night to go to the bathroom! I keep thinking that maybe when I look pregnant I'll also feel pregnant, and some of these other feelings will fade.

In other news, we had our monthly check-up this week, and have come to realize that those are almost boring. It's almost like a "thumbs up! you're still pregnant!" and that's it. We did get to hear the baby's heartbeat again, and that was really great. We have our first prenatal screening visit coming up this next week, which is a bit nerve racking. Basically this test is the first of two which will let us know if there looks like there could be any major problems with the little sprout. I'm just focusing on the fact that I get a sonogram out of this visit, which I'm incredibly excited about! Hopefully I'll have our baby's first picture to post in the next few days!!

10 wks

2008-07-31T08:38:00.000-07:00

I swear there's a baby in there!!!

Right now, I wonder about that on occasion too. If it weren't for the instant nausea I get if I don't eat on a regular basis and the lack of having my period, I'd question if I were preggers. As terrified as I am to see my body go through the rapid and massive changes that are shortly in store, I can't wait to actually see some proof of this pregnancy body-wise. I know TJ's looking forward to me finally showing. He insists that he'll feel even more connected to what's going on when he can reach out and touch something. :)

This week and weeks forward, the little sprout is poised for rapid growth and weight gain! So exciting. Actually, and amazingly, most of all of his/her critical development is already completed. My little one can kick and bend his/her arms and wrists. He/she's developing little fingernails and hair on it's body. It's kind of strange to imagine this mini-baby swimming and kicking around inside of me, but exciting all at the same time!

We are also just dying to know what we're having (boy/girl). It really doesn't matter either way to either of us, but it would be so great to be able to call it by it's name and identify with it more clearly, ie: "I can't wait to take our little girl to the beach in her little baby-bikini, or I can't wait till daddy can take our little guy fishing, etc." We only have about a month and a 1/2 till we should be able to find out, and we can't wait. We're also really looking forward to our next sonogram and finally having a picture of the little one. Our next appointment's not for another 2 weeks, and being nearly at the end of the first trimester, we should have a lot to see, as opposed to the last one where we really just saw a small blob. :) So, so much to look forward to!

9 wks

2008-07-25T06:42:00.000-07:00

I'm almost in double digits, bi*ches! ;)

Things are good this week. Still dealing with fatigue - I couldn't move yesterday. But, if this is going to be the worst of it, I'm totally fine with that.

Food cravings and aversions are always listed in the pregnancy symptoms list, and I've had very few, except for one particularly annoying one. I am having the hardest time stomaching salad dressing. I mean - just watching salad dressing commercials make me physically gag. Very difficult for the the vegetarian to handle. Difficult and unfair. I love salad, and I haven't been able to get through one in the past few weeks without struggling. Aside from that, there haven't been any really strong cravings - save a couple of trips to Dairy Queen for some soft serve with rainbow sprinkles :).

TJ and I are still plowing through our baby books. He's been reading ahead and is always excited to tell me all of the exciting things that are on their way. I'm trying to read month to month, so I have something to look forward to every couple of weeks. We've adjusted to our new, more mellow life very easily. We weren't much for late night partying anyway, and I think we are both excited for the excuse for early bedtimes.

As far as what's actually happening in there, this week the little sprout's the size of large olive. He or she has elbows that are already bending and is forming his/her knees and ankles. Muscles and cartilage are beginning to form and the baby's finally officially graduated from the embryo to fetus stage - just baby to us. :)

8 wks

2008-07-23T17:27:00.000-07:00

This past week my best friend was in town visiting from Rhode Island. Normally, this would mean long nights of talking and drinking good red wine, while munching on yummy cheeses and other little decadent treats. Needless to say, this visit was a bit different. Fortunately, she was very accommodating to my new lifestyle restrictions, and with her insane work schedule back at home, was more than happy to indulge in afternoon naps and early bedtimes. :)

Having been feeling pretty good lately, aside from some fatigue issues, I was thrilled to plan a special girl's dinner at my favorite South Beach restaurant with my Rhode Island friend and another good girlfriend who was in for the weekend. We threw caution to the wind (a.k.a. our wallets) and indulged in cocktails (non-alc for me of course), appetizers, entree`s, and a spectacularly fabulous dessert! Then I promptly went home and threw it all up. Yeah. No joke. Just out of the blue, violently sick. I'm guessing I need to stick to more of my usual, everyday diet right now. I will say that this pregnancy keeps me guessing.

My Body is Not My Own.

2008-07-14T09:23:00.000-07:00

I'm 28 years old. I've had 28 years to sort myself out, both physically and emotionally. On the physical front, I feel like I've gotten rather comfortable with myself - at least I know what to expect. I know what my hair will look like dried naturally, blown out or straight-ironed. I know what will hold it up and what it's texture is. I know that my skin isn't perfect and, accordingly, what kind of soap/moisturizers/skin care products work best. I know where to expect a pimple and how long it will choose to reside in that place. I know what shades of make-up work best with my skin and eyes, what fit of clothes work best with my figure and where to find all of those things. I know how quickly I gain weight and where, what to do to lose it and about how long that will take. I've had a lot of time to work those things out, and regardless of whether the results are always what I'm wanting, I at least have a good idea of what to expect.

Enter pregnancy.

Here's what I was unaware of:
That "pregnancy glow"? Well, that's your hormones working in over-drive, giving my naturally non-oily face an oil-slick to deal with. Not having the right skin products to deal with this new development turned that oil-slick into pimples in odd places and left the make-up I own ill-equipped to handle the aforementioned oily skin. Those same hormones that people say make the hair on your head beautiful and shiny also make your hair grow ridiculously fast. Nothing like looking like "amazon-lady" if you don't shave under your arms and your legs EVERY freaking day. Unbelievable. The weight gain is still minimal, but it's in such an odd place that I'm left looking like the girl walking around that just can't hold her stomach in. All I need to do now is walk around a gas station barefoot and I'll have the Britney Spear's pregnancy look down pat. And, finally, what this tiny, little sprout is doing to my insides is like the first little rebellion against me of his or her life! I have to eat every few hours or else I'm instantly nauseous, and all the fabulously healthy food that I'm eating for this little one has made me horrendously constipated. Sorry for the too much information, but let the truth be told! My beautiful gym routine and "regular" cycle - all terrifically disturbed. I spent my entire weekend trying different "methods" to coax my body back into it's normal routine. Fabulous.

Now, don't get me wrong. This baby is a through and through blessing, and I'm very thrilled to be carrying it. And certainly, many women deal with much worse problems. I'm clearly aware of that fact. It's just this strange sense of not knowing what to expect from myself. Each week is a new set of rules as far as what I can eat and do, etc. This constantly changing environment is quite a challenge for someone who enjoys a (at least) basic sense of control over her life.

I can't say I'm one of those women who is blissful with her pregnancy experience so far, but I can say that I'm ok with it. And furthermore, I'm over the moon with what the outcome will be. And, you know what,"ok" is something I think I can learn to live with. :)

7 weeks

2008-07-09T20:49:00.000-07:00

So here I am at the 7 week mark. It's strange, because when I say it that way, it seems like it's so early that I'm practically not pregnant at all. At the same time, these past 3 weeks feel as if they were really 3 months. Maybe it's just because we've been faced with everything in our lives changing within these few weeks - maybe it's because so much is changing with my body so fast. Eitherway, it's very surreal.

Aside from the fact that I'm ridiculously tired ALL the time, I find myself wanting to be nowhere but home now. I just want to be curled up on my couch and I want to be with TJ constantly. (My book said this could happen.) It's an inexplicable desire. Not that I didn't want to spend time with my husband previously; I've always enjoyed that. But now, I want to be curled up on the couch with him and that's it - all.the.time. I guess the only way I can describe it is that I want to feel as close to him physically as this event in our lives is making me feel emotionally. I want to be able to look in his eyes and smile and laugh with him as we talk about this new little one and what it means for us, and I want to feel safe and comfortable in his arms while my whole world is changing. He's been very obliging to my clingy-ness and I love him for it.

Then there's a whole other part of my psyche that is telling me to get up and go! To jam as much as I possibly can into these precious months before all is changed. To enjoy this time being a "single being" - not directly responsible for the life and well-being of another. Go to the beach while you still have a pre-pregnancy body, enjoy evenings out with friends, make last minute decisions to quietly window-shop at your favorite home-stores - maybe finding a good deal on that perfect addition to the living room! Do! Do! Do! I really can see the logic in all of this. Maybe next tri-mester I'll finally find the energy.

I'll I can say is this is a whirlwind. This kid has no idea how much time and thought has already gone into it's tiny, little life, and we're just getting started.

6 weeks, 5 days

2008-07-07T14:04:00.000-07:00

A whole heck of a lot has happened in this past week - to say the least. Starting with our first holiday celebration (minus drinking for me) with friends. We used it as an opportunity to tell our closest the good news. Everyone seemed a bit shocked, but the news went over well. Another first this past week was the first feelings of morning sickness. And they are right when they say it's not just in the morning. I can't complain too much, because I really only dealt with it for 3 days and now it's just an off and on sort of thing, but it certainly wasn't enjoyable. Full of dry heaving and waves of nausea; hopefully that's not to stay. Other than that, I haven't gained any weight at all, which I attribute to eating well and staying in the gym. I also don't have many of the other "common" symptoms anymore. It left me with a weird un-pregnant feeling.

This all led to Saturday night.... TJ was on shift that day and I was just exhausted. So tired that after sleeping till 10 I laid back down at 1:30 and didn't wake up till 6. For a baby so, so tiny, it sure does take a lot out of me. I got up had some food and went to the gym for a 1/2 hr or so. When I got home and used the bathroom I noticed I had some spotting, which absolutely terrified me. I immediately grabbed my baby book and the information is just so sporadic. Apparently this happens in 1/3 of all pregnancies (great. normal), but 1/2 of those pregnancies end in miscarriage (completely terrifying). I didn't really fall apart till TJ got home the next morning. All of that fear just came pouring out, and the worst part was that there was nothing we could do about it till the morning. We both got up early Monday (today) and started calling the doctor's office. They had us rush in for a check up, as we expected. After 8 viles of blood, and a quick doctor's check-up, they set us up with an appt. for our first ultrasound.

We had the ultrasound today, which was the upside of a stressful two days. And what an upside it was! We got to see and hear our baby's heartbeat for the first time!! I was actually surprised at how emotional it made me. I'm not sure if it was just the relief of seeing the heartbeat and seeing that there wasn't a problem, or just the amazingness of the experience alone. Probably a bit of both. TJ and I were both in tears with grins plastered across our faces. We'll have the doctor's version of the results tomorrow, but the ultrasound tech said everything looked normal and healthy. I really can't begin to explain the relief I felt and am feeling now. The tech took exact measurements and it looks like I'm actually 6 weeks and 5 days along. Our new due date is February 25. We're getting closer and closer to having this baby on our wedding anniversary :)

Little sprout is about the size of a blueberry this week and is (appropriately) "sprouting" it's arm and leg buds, which are starting to develop into their indivual parts (knees, feet, elbows, etc.). The babe is also something like 10,000 times the size it was at conception and it's developing 100 brain cells a minute. That's a busy little bee.

5 wks, 4 dys

2008-07-02T08:41:00.000-07:00

So, here we are a week later. The fact that I'm pregnant is finally "starting" to set in. It's wonderful; it just feels a little (a lot) unbelieveable at times. TJ is on cloud nine, and we started telling friends and family this week. His parents were ecstatic, as we expected, but we got a much more random reaction (or lack of, really) from my parents. Not surprising when it comes to my family, unfortunately. It's been fun telling the news kind of slowly and selectively - like we have a secret, just between the two of us :) There's a healthy dose of nerves mixed in. The fear of miscarrage and then a problem with the baby is always in the back of our minds. We're trying to keep it in the back, though, as worrying is not going to change whatever the circumstances might be.

This has been a HUGE week of changes, both physically and in lifestyle. I'm experiencing my first of the pregnancy symptoms and am starting to feel pregnant. Most of the symptoms, of course, are less than pleasant - constipation, gassiness, bloatedness, tender boobs, REALLY frequent urination - really fun stuff. Fortunately, no morning sickness! I'm really, really hoping that that continues. The bloating kind of sucks. I feel like I'm walking around with a big bubble in my lower abdomen.

On the lifestyle note, I took a huge trip to the grocery store and got tons of food that fits into the "pregnancy diet". I've got this one chance to do this right, and I want to make sure that I'm filling my body with all of the nutrients that the little sprout needs. Plus there' s a ton of brain development going on in the next few weeks and it's the least I can do to make sure that's aided as much as possible. Obviously there's a full stop on any drinking and TJ's quitting smoking (finally). I'm still drinking a cup of coffee a day and the only thing I'm really missing right now is being able to drink wine. I'm trying to hit the gym at least 5 days a week and am really focused on controlling weight gain and staying strong throughout this thing.

We had our first doctor's visit the day I took this photo. He said everything looks great (although we won't have an ultrasound for another 4 1/2 wks). He did say that my uterus felt big for 5 weeks, but is was still "normal". God only knows what that means.

We're both busy reading our baby books. Names have been picked out (like 2 years ago), and I can't help but look at baby furniture. I know we're 15 steps ahead, but we're both just so excited. :)

4 wks

2008-07-02T07:58:00.001-07:00

4wks.
I've decided to take pictures once a week for the next (36) weeks (yipes!, yes, that's all!). Maybe I'll make a flip book. ;)

So, this is the morning after I found out that we have a little one on the way. I hadn't even told TJ yet (he hadn't gotten off-shift yet). I barely slept the night before. Nerves and excitement all mixed together.
On a personal note, I'd been in the gym for the past month or two and was finally just seeing results. There was definitely a twinge of - "of course. now, no matter what I do I'm just going to get huge." Petty, I know, but truthful.
This day was just a bit overwhelming.

OMG.

2008-07-02T07:46:00.000-07:00

uh. wow. here we go...